I can't explain ...

There is really so much in my life that I should be thankful for. Yet, there is so much that bothers me in my heart. The only reason I say this is because of the fact is I care for someone so much yet it goes unnoticed I never wanted to end this way.  I loved him so much and yet he never truly understood just how much. Another feeling in my heart was the fact that I thought I had someone from my past love me. Yet, he ignores and forgets about me I know that it's the past,but I thought there was someone who really loved for who I am. I can't explain how alone I feel in this world I have my family and my close friends yet I still there is something missing. My heart was aching knowing that there was nothing that I could do to end this drama. There is a hole in my heart knowin that there is something missing. I long for a love that not just anyone can fill. I feel it must be someone who can understand me in everyway. Mind, heart, and most of all my soul these things are the most difficult to cover not just anyone can fill these things. I wish that everything I ever wanted would happen in my life. Yet, I must play the waiting game which is the most annoying game to ever play. I have learned to live with it in my life but really all I want to do is cry since I see no happiness coming from my own life. I watch as others find some one to love and care about and yet I sit in the background and suffer with nothing to show. I just show how much my heart aches through writing but I feel no one can really hear me when I cry. I scream out in my writing for someone to understand just how I feel that is all I can ever do. Well this is the end this is how I will end it.....